Appearances Can Be Devastating

You know what really bugs me? The way people are snarking on Mariah Carey’s appearance (as in how she looked in her dress) at the Grammy Awards show. The woman has been nominated and won all sorts of awards for her voice and all we’ve got is, “she looks fat”

Cause seriously folks, if Mariah Carey is fat, what does that say for the rest of the women who aren’t Sarah Jessica Parker thin? And moreover, why does it matter?

Mariah Carey has enough issues to snark on rightfully (hello, she’s batshit crazy!) but I don’t understand why how fat she looks in a designer dress is helpful to either crazy Mariah or anyone else.

Cause let’s face it, women have enough shit to shovel when it comes to their bodies. Our breasts are too big or too small. Our stomachs aren’t flat enough, our asses aren’t J Lo perfect, legs too long or short, we’re too tall or short, hair too curly or straight. And fat, well fat is the cudgel that hits straight to the heart.

I’ve been thin and I’ve been fat. I have to say I had far fewer issues with my body when I was fat. I never had self image problems but that may be because I always felt desired by my partner. But now, the thinnest I’ve been since college, I find myself much more self aware about weight and body image than I’ve ever been. It’s odd to suddenly have this when I haven’t since I was twenty years old.

I feel responsible to write women that are of all shapes and sizes and to make their lives and their happiness not revolve around their jeans size. It’s a difficult line to walk and snarking about a celebrity looking fat when she’s obviously not (brittney spears too) just compounds the problem. Hell, most women work damned hard to look as thin as Mariah looks “fat” and I just don’t think we’re saying much positive about ourselves to make fun of it.

5 comments to “Appearances Can Be Devastating”

  1. Candice Gilmer
    February 15th, 2006 at 6:47 pm · Link

    I agree with you… people need to get a grip.

    We all have body issues, I know I do… But society as a whole won’t get a grip until we realize how unhealthy it is to be that “thin.”

    I live in the midwest, and frankly, Jen Aniston or Calista Flockhart would get blown away on a breezy day…

  2. Karen Scott
    February 16th, 2006 at 1:05 am · Link

    I totally agree with you, the press are the first people to point to somebody like Nicole Richie and Lindsey Lohan and condemn them for being too thin, then turn around and criticise them if they put too much weight on.

    Methinks a lot of the self-esteem issues most Hollywood types have can probably be put down to the gutter press.

  3. lili-g
    February 16th, 2006 at 6:19 am · Link

    It’s not necessarily unhealthy to be that “thin.” No more unhealthy than it is to be that “fat.” For some people it’s natural. For others it’s a health issue beyond their control.

    The insult works both ways – it’s insulting to tell someone they’re too fat, and it’s equally insulting to tell someone they’re too skinny. Both hurt.

    I have no sympathy for Hollywood people, they make their living in the spotlight. It’s their choice.

    Media is a machine that follows the wants of its people. People want trash talk, that’s what they get.

  4. Charlene Teglia
    February 16th, 2006 at 9:39 am · Link

    Who said “A waist is a terrible thing to mind”? So many more important issues to worry about. Hope you’re bundled up, Lauren! It’s ccccoooolllddd over here.

  5. Millenia Black
    February 17th, 2006 at 10:06 am · Link

    I think it’s ridiculous. Mariah looks fine. It’s those free-base-looking chicks they need to rag on!

    Lindsay Lohan. Nicole Richie. Calista Flockhart. Laura Flynn Boyle. You know the lot.

    It’s just ridiculous vanity. And shame on the idiots that succumb to the shallow pressure.

    Isn’t that like an oxymoron or something? Shallow pressure? LOL But – that’s exactly what it is.