I’m a very blessed person. I am. I have so much to be thankful for and while I get cranky over stupid stuff, it’s never far from my mind just who much I have in my life to celebrate.
Yesterday the UPS truck pulled up to my door and my totally handsome UPS delivery guy brought six boxes to my doorstep. Two of those boxes contained postcards I recently had made for the Vegas release and also for Undercover. Another one contained new business cards – all this designed for me by Frauke who is wonderful and fabulous.
Two more contained my author copies of What Happens in Vegas which I carefully opened and then stood there, just staring at the books within. They’re a good weight. I love the cover very much. I flipped through, loving the little scene break icons (nifty little vegas styled card icons) and then i read my acknowledgements and I started to cry.
This book sold at a time when I was really low. I was really beginning to wonder if I’d ever break into New York and it got me through in a way I can’t even think about right now without crying. I’m not used to not being confident about my work. I was raised to believe if you worked your hardest at something you’d succeed. The publishing industry doesn’t always work that way. It certainly takes hard work, but it’s not enough. Waiting is really hard and it can kill your confidence.
So when I picked it up and held it, I did so knowing that the sweet feeling belonged to more than just me. It belongs to my husband. Ray. He’s my best friend and my number one fan. He has supported my work without fail. It belongs to my agent and friend Laura Bradford who has been there for me, flogging the hell out of my books to editors for going on two years now. When she called me to tell me about my Berkley deal she didn’t miss a beat when I started to cry. She’s awesome and I love her. It belongs to my parents who raised me to know everything is possible (and my mom who harasses people in bookstores to buy my books!). It belongs to my readers who have supported me continuously across publishers – Renee and Tracy who’ve beta read for me countless times. It goes to a lot of people because none of us does this alone. Ann Leveille at Ellora’s Cave and Angie James at Samhain who’ve been such fabulous editors they’ve both helped me become a better writer with each book. Megan Hart and Anya Bast who’ve been my homegirls for a number of years now who have read my stuff and critted it and who have just been the kinds of people I can trust to never bullshit me.
Anyway, I’m being sort of schmoopy but I never, ever want to be that person. You know the one who tells everyone she’s the master of her genre or the best mother in the world or whatever. Because I’m not here solely on my own merits. I’m here because of the support and efforts of those people around me.
Thank you, all of you, for helping me make my dreams come true.