Vixenwriter

We colored eggs today. Of course no one will eat them, but I suppose it’s fun to have the memory of coloring them nonetheless. I can remember egg hunts with my family, even from a very young age. My husband mowed the lawn yesterday in the backyard so we won’t actually lose a child in the tall grass, LOL. So tomorrow I will hide eggs and they will eat too much sugar and we’ll send pictures to my parents and my sister in law and it’ll be another day filled with memories.

I was thinking about this as I was working on my new WIP. Thinking about creating characters with memories and a past and finding the proper balance on the page. To me, as I’m writing, the character is revealing herself as I go. What are her quirks? Her habits? Why does she react a certain way in some situations?

As a reader, I love it when over the course of a story I walk away with a real sense of the characters as people. Not as cardboard stereotypes but as people. I just finished Nalini Singh’s Visions of Heat and Faith, a character who is without emotion for most of her life, was so three dimensional to me. Just as three dimensional as Vaughan, a changeling driven by his need for revenge and the instincts of the cat who lives within him.

Singh uses a fine touch here and there to unfold them both for the reader and it’s a touch I admire as a writer. The ability to convey personhood with a sentence here, a flash of insight there, a reaction or failure to react. It’s all in the way we relate our stories through our characters.

I don’t think there’s a way to learn it. There’s no one true way and it’s not something that works for every reader in every book either. Different authors with different voices do it - Megan Hart’s revelation of Elle in Dirty for instance - completely different than Singh and yet, still totally effective. Patricia Briggs and the way she’s revealing Mercy to us in Moon Called and Blood Bound. Jenny Cruisie in Bet Me - all very different authors and stories, all done very differently but all done very effectively.

Without compelling characters, even the most brilliant story will fall flat.

Back to my own story. I need to referee a fight breaking out in the back yard. Have a nice weekend everyone!

My new website is nearly ready to go live! Frauke tells me it should be ready to go live Monday or Tuesday so you might see a maintenance screen as she’s putting everything in place. I’m really thrilled with the design she’s created for me - something totally new and a great combo of my paranormal/romantic suspense and contemporary stuff. I can’t wait!

A few weeks back I read No Rest For the Wicked. Admittedly, I loved the world but I came in without having read book one and the heroine wasn’t someone I ever connected with. I thought her resistance went on too long and then her turning to the hero felt too sudden and with her resistance lasting so long, I didn’t find myself convinced. Aside from the Bride aspects, I had to wonder at times just why he was attracted to her. In fated mate stories, which I quite like, I still want to know they’d be together at the end despite the magic of the bond. If not, it seems like their connection is suspect and you’d always be doubting it. Still, I liked the hero and like I said, I think Cole’s meta story about the Lore is a really interesting one.

I hadn’t planned on picking up A Hunger Like No Other but it came into my hands and I thought I’d give it a look and I was hooked instantly. In A Hunger Like No Other, Cole gives us an uber alpha male (literally) we can sink our teeth into (and we want to). He’s bossy and arrogant but there’s a reason for it. I LOVED the way Cole dragged out Emmaline’s reluctance to give in to her feelings. She has reasons and that was important. If Emma had just flopped her thighs open and given in on the third day, I’d have put the book down. It’s a hard line to walk and I think Cole did it perfectly. The chemistry was wonderful, the hero was oh-so-delightfully tortured and the heroine has major self esteem issues and she comes into her own through the hero but not because of him. Anyway, I loved the book and I’ll be back for the next installment.

Kitty Takes A Holiday I love this series so very much. I love that at the end of every book so far, I’m never where I imagined I’d be but I like where Vaughn takes me anyway. It’s creative and smart and with each book, Kitty grows as a person and as a wolf. I was very surprised with several directions the story took but Vaughn kept me fascinated at every turn and of course I’ll be rushing out to grab Kitty and the Silver Bullet. What I absolutely love is when the end of a book comes and I want to weep that I’ll have to wait months and months for the next one. These are not romances so Vaughn gets to take more risks and break some rules. I loved every page.

Thirteen PJ Harvey Lyric Snippets I Love

I’m a huge PJ Harvey fan. My second summer at college my friend April brought Dry to work and that was it. I’ve loved her ever since (oh and April too! Hi April XOXO!). There’s nothing like angry PJ, but I still love PJ in love and in New York City too. If I had to pick a favorite CD it would be Rid of Me. Favorite song? Impossible to choose! **Edited to add links to hear some of her music because many haven’t yet. On the amazon pages you can scroll down and listen to snippets*

1. Speak, I’m listening. Baby, I’m your sweet thing… Rub ‘Til It Bleeds

2. Give just everything, She’s got me so mesmerized… Yuri G

3. I’m coming up man size, Skinned alive. I want to fit, Got to get, Man size, I’m heading on, Handsome, Got my leather boots on… Man Size

4. look at these, my child-bearing hips, look at these, my ruby-red ruby lips, look at these, my work strong-arms, you’ve got to see my bottle full of charm… Sheela na Gig

5. Angel at my table, God in my car… Victory

6 Over, Under, Die of, Pleasure - Long Snake Moan

7. And this world tonight is mine, A world to be remembered in… The Sky Lit Up

8.

9. Can’t you see, In my handwriting, The curve Of my g? The longing …The Letter

10. God of piston, God of steel, God is there, behind my wheel - Working For the Man

11. I remember it all started when he bought that car, It was the first thing he’d ever owned apart from me, And the color was red…Taut

12. Tie yourself, to me, and no one else…Rid of Me

13. I’d put stars at your feet, Put Mars in your head… Missed

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He drops the coil at the ground where I’m kneeling. The sound is muffled by the carpet. It’s pretty there, the blue against the sandy beige. I can smell it, the dye, the rope itself.

Tearing my eyes away from it I look up into his eyes. Eyes glittering with intent. With desire.

In his hands the rope becomes a tool to bind me, to hold me in place. To him. The feel of it against my flesh slightly abrades, keeps me feeling slightly drunk. The pads of his fingers brush against me as he’s working, the contrast of the soft yet calloused skin with the rope is delightful.

He winds it around my breasts, across my back, under my arm and around my breasts again. Over stomach and arms, binding, caressing. I’m swaying slightly, as if there’s music in my head that’s enchanting me.

The work continues and is pushed to pinpoint focus. The sound of his breathing, of his movements around me, of my own breathing as it quickens and the occasional moan of pleasure. I can feel the heat of his body as he moves, I can smell him, the shaving lotion he uses that I love so much, beneath that, his own elemental scent.

When he’s done, he stands back and inspects his work and for the first time I look up and into the mirrors, suddenly dazed at the woman reflected there…

Writers handle subjects in as many ways as well, there are writers. Me? I’m of the responsibility school. I’m not going to show the hero flossing his teeth, but in a contemporary erotic story, he’s going to use a condom or I give a reason why. That’s a personal thing. As a reader, I notice it every time couples in contemporaries don’t use condoms and all I can think about are STDs and pregnancy. It yanks me out of a very hot scene. I don’t need a huge deal to be made out of condom use, just an indication that it’s happening in one scene can establish it but I digress…

In BDSM books, I have my characters set rules and establish a safeword and outline consent. Consent is a really big button of mine. It’s why I don’t ever write rape as titilation and I don’t write or read forced seduction. Being raped isn’t sexy, it’s not fun. But playing with power and control is fun and as long as everyone is on the same page, play within those boundaries is sexy.

Mistress Matisse - a local Domme and a woman whose column I read on a regular basis (along with a very well written blog) did a piece in last week’s Stranger about consent.

What is the difference between BDSM and abuse? Kinky people would like to be able to draw a clear line, but like vanilla sex, it all spins on consent, and consent is a fluid, dynamic thing. You don’t give it once and that’s it for all time. You give it, either tacitly or overtly, every time you play.

The points she makes are important because when you give submission to someone, you’re handing yourself to them. That means as a sub, you’re trusting your partner and as a Dom, you’re taking charge of someone - we don’t read a whole lot about the responsibility of Dom/mes in books. They’re often stereotypes nearly as bad as the weak, broken submissive. The issue is that D/s and BDSM in general are play, yes, but with that comes responsibilty from both parties. Like any other sexual activity - you need consent and trust.

The lesson for dominants: Know your partner. Negotiate and get clear consent—and, yes, it can be done without being a buzz-kill. And be aware that no matter what someone says, you’re taking a leap of faith when you pick up the whip. For submissives: Even if you call yourself a slave, the person primarily responsible for your safety is you. If something’s going wrong, say so—promptly. A good dominant will want that information. Someone who doesn’t care isn’t someone you should belong to.

So in my D/s books, even in books where D/s is prominent enough that it’s more than just a slap on the ass or holding hands above the head, there’s going to be a discussion. The whole thing isn’t necessarily going to happen on the page, but the reader will know the submissive consented and also that the Dom made sure he had it. That’s part of sexy for me when I’m shaping a character - I want the Dom to be strong, yes, but intelligent and worthy of the submission he or she is seeking from his/her partner.

Yes, there are books and stories which play on “edge” ideas like no consent. I don’t read them and I don’t write them. I’m not saying they should be banned, I’m saying I don’t read them and I don’t write them and I’d never play that way.

Consent is sexy. For the submissive, having a safe word, knowing somehwere deep that he or she has a way to stop things if necessary is important but s/he also has a way to be pushed past comfort zones by a Dom who knows what he’s about. A Dom who cares to make sure she’s all right. That’s sexy.

I think I’m going to actually do a theme week - partially anyway - on BDSM. For ease of pronouns I’m going to use she a lot for sub and he a lot for Dom but there are female tops and male bottoms too.

I just finished up a partial for Wolf Unbound and I’m probably going to get back to Marked By Magic this week since I’m in a BDSM state of mind. I love to write D/s storylines. Like menages though, it has to be the right combination of story and character with realism threaded through it or it’s just a gimmick and it misses the depth of emotion the issue provides. I don’t write them all the time but there are elements of kink and power exchange in many of my books.

Tomorrow I’m going to talk about consent but for today, I want to touch on the depth of emotion involved in power exchange because this is what I think people miss when they write D/s for the titilation factor/as a gimmick.

There’s a woman on one of the romance boards I haunt (and have for many years now) and she’s got major issues with BDSM. Which is fine. It’s not everyone’s thing and preferences make us human. But what always gets me is that her objections to it are based on outright falsehoolds and misperceptions of what D/s and power exchange truly is. It’s knee jerk and I find it happens a lot with BDSM in general. Partly that’s because of how it’s written.

For me, when I write it, there’s a depth of emotion that taps into the darker part of the sexual self. And I don’t mean blood sacrifices to satan dark, I mean the edges of things we want but are too shy to articulate, the craving to give up control and let someone else push your boundaries.

There are other things I like to play with - like letting go of self and slipping into an altered state like subspace or ropespace. Like the sub being seen and thought of as a beautiful object. Not in a negative sense but in the sense of being wanton and on display purely for someone else’s pleasure. There’s a depth of strength in that, in being able to let go and simply be there for someone else.

At the same time, I grow tired of seeing sexually submissive women being written as damaged and weak. Are there sexually submissive women who are damaged and weak? Yes. Are there sexually submissive women who are intelligent, whole and strong? Yes. Since I strive to write my heroines as strong women, I find embracing stereotypes to not be helpful. I don’t write weak heroines no matter the story. She may be hurt or damaged in some sense, but I don’t write her as seeking a certain kind of sexual expression to act out her issues. That’s just me and my own writerly preferences.

I love to explore why a character submits. What does she get from it? And I don’t mean, “ooh he spanked me” but what is it about having her arms held above her head that makes her go slightly sluggish? What does it do to her body other than thrust out her breasts? What about her reactions as she watches him?

That’s one thing I notice not being addressed very much - what does the Dom/top look like when he’s working? Does his face change? Does his attitude change? How? And yes, we know he’s a Dom and all, but it’s not easy to be a good Dom so give us some of his POV please. What does it feel like for him to dominate her? Why does he do it? And yes, we know he can spank her (and god, you’d think all D/s people did was spank the way it’s written most of the time) - but physically and emotionally, what does her submission do for him?

Anyway, just a basic toe in the water here. Tomorrow I’ll be back for more with an entry about consent and safewords.

OH! And some excellent D/s authors? I’ll give you one a day and at the end of the week I’ll pimp a few books for you that I love. Today though - Joey Hill is up there for me because she absolutely writes her characters as real people with real motivations. And she writes Dommes and male submissives in a convincing and sexy way without calling on stereotypes. I’ve not read too many other authors who can do it as well as she does. BTW, she’s got a BDSM paranormal coming from Berkley this summer called The Vampire Queen’s Servant and you can bet II’ve got this one pre-ordered from Amazon

Boy am I mean mommy this morning. My kids were very loud starting at 5:45 am! Slamming doors, yelling and fighting. Mommy’s thoughts of revenge were not very nice. Sigh. So I had to get up when they woke Morrigan up, the little beasts. They are quieter now as I took away their DSs for the whole day.

On a brighter note, I saw my new website template yesterday and I couldn’t be more thrilled with it. It’s fabulous and I can’t wait to unveil it. Frauke (a goddess and a half) tells me it should be up this time next week! Heeee!

Godiva sent me an Easter special offer. HOleeeeee Moley! I love me some Godiva chocolate and I just may need to order something. I’d pretend and say I was ordering it for RT to share with Megan but I’d be lying. I will share it with my husband though.

I’m going clothes shopping later today. I need a pair of heels to go with one of the dresses I bought for RT and some new jeans. The jeans I have start falling off as I walk. This isn’t a bad thing really, but I don’t want to go to the mall today. Ah well, I’m hoping I can find skinny jeans - they’ve been scarce and my favorite pair is just way too big now, even with a belt.

23 days until I fly out for RT! Not that I’m excited about going or anything, LOL.